lazypadawan | Zombie Apocalypse Watch

(Warning: This post and links are NOT for the faint-hearted)

First we have the bizarre and appalling (though as a Miami native, not entirely surprising to me) cannibal attack by a guy hepped up on "bath salts" and possibly under a voodoo spell:

http://miami.cbslocal.com/2012/05/31/girlfriend-recalls-rudy-eugenes-final-day/

It’s entirely feasible that zombies could migrate their way north in time for Celebration VI. And if anyone buys “bath salts” from the local Elan Sleazebaggano, just remember, I may very well have to shoot you. I’m not letting some fanboy or worse yet, a Celebration guest, eat my face, thank you very much.

But another zombie incident took place in New Jersey shortly thereafter, where a guy cut out his intestines and tossed them at the cops:

http://newsfeed.time.com/2012/05/31/zombie-alert-man-throws-his-own-intestines-at-police/

And now there's this sick bastard who sent severed body parts to a political HQ in Canada, now on the lam for being a murder suspect involving a snuff movie that included cannibalism. His previous claim to fame was killing kittens. Seriously, this story could give you nightmares. Proceed with caution:

http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/05/31/luka-rocco-magnottas-family-awaiting-call-from-suspect-as-interpol-joins-manhunt/

If you'll excuse me, I'm picking up some gas masks and artillery before I hide out in my "Doomsday Preppers" shelter.