A Touch of Grey: lazypadawan's review of Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull

[lazypadawan]

I saw KOTCS 10:40 this morning...let me tell you, if you want to beat the crowds go early on a weekday. I saw posters in the theater for X-Files and Clone Wars, but didn't see trailers for either film. In fact, as far as trailers went, I feel a little cheated. No Dark Knight. No X-Files. No Clone Wars. The only movie that looks really good is Wall-E, while Hellboy II and Hancock look rent-worthy. The rest of the trailers include some oddball Brad Pitt movie, an epic-y looking Baz Luhrmann flick called Australia, and some Shia LeBeouf thriller. It must be a rule that the stars of KOTCS's upcoming projects get their trailers shown before the movie, since the Pitt movie also has Cate Blanchett.

It's been a whole 19 years since Indiana Jones's last big screen adventure, a longer time than the span between Return of the Jedi and The Phantom Menace. The challenge of doing a new Indiana Jones movie after all of these years is that it has to be different--because there's no fooling anyone that Harrison Ford is a spring chicken anymore--and yet, it has to be faithful to the conventions established by the other movies. It's an interesting balance and the good news is that's exactly what KOTCS does.

The movie takes place in 1957 and not only are there no more Nazis to kick around, making the film in the same 1930s serial style as its predecessors wouldn't make any sense. Instead, KOTCS borrows from 1950s B-movies, complete with aliens, flying saucers, and even a greasers vs. jocks fight. The very beginning of the film will remind you more of American Graffiti than anything else. This change might throw off fans who prefer the '30s feel of the other Indy films.

However, the car chases, 'splosions, fights, and the hazards of field archeology in forbidden locales are still the same. There's even the red line that travels on the map. What separates these movies from other action/adventure films is not only the clever way they're set up, but also the wink-and-a-nod attitude. Indiana Jones is such a bad arse he can not only outsmart the baddies and give them a good thrashing, but he can also SURVIVE A NUCLEAR BLAST!! I don't know what his chances are of surviving cancer though :O. The humor that is an essential ingredient of the Indy experience is still there.

Ford obviously relishes wearing the hat again. This is the most life he's shown in a movie in years. An older Indiana Jones is a bit more thoughtful and wistful, but still loves a good adventure. I thought he played off really well with Shia LeBeouf, who turns out to be Indy's long-lost illegitimate son. For years, I thought setting up a father-son type of thing in a post-Last Crusade setting would be a great idea. A lot of internet wags had doubts about LeBeouf, but you know something, the kid did just fine. I actually enjoyed him in this film. Cate Blanchett plays the villain. Thank you Senor Spielbergo and Papa George for not making her another one of Indy's love interests. It had been done before in Last Crusade and Cate is young enough to be Ford's daughter. That would've been yucky. Blanchett's Dr. Spalko is one cold cookie, complete with a "get da moose and squirrel" Russian accent. Smart and psychic, she wants to use the potential power of the skull to control everyone's minds. Bwahahaha! Ray Winstone is the conniving is he good/is he bad old friend of Dr. Jones. John Hurt plays the archaeologist who initially discovered the crystal skull. Remember how Brody acted like he was drunk or something in The Last Crusade? Hurt sort of fulfills the same function this time, which you may or may not find annoying. And last but not least Karen Allen comes back as fan fave Marion. Some of her bickering with Ford sounds more like a grouchy middle-aged married couple than UST sparkage, but things come full circle between her and Indy. Indy/Marion shippers will LOVE the ending.

In many ways the film is a group hug for fans. There are references galore to Indiana Jones lore, even to an episode of The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles! Sadly, we learn that Henry Jones Sr. is gone (hey, I thought that Holy Grail stuff was supposed to make you immortal) as is Brody (the actor who played him died several years ago). The Ark makes a brief drive-by cameo. I'm sure there are dozens of other Easter eggs I'll pick up with more viewings. Oh, and Indiana Jones gives a brief tip of the hat to the SW saga with the immortal line, "I have a bad feeling about this."

The Soviets present an interesting change from the Nazis of Raiders and The Last Crusade. In real life, the Nazis were obsessed with possessing supernatural and mystical objects, including the Ark of the Covenant and the Spear of Destiny, which plays out in the previous films. The Soviets on the other hand were obsessed with UFOs and psychic research. The menace of Nazi Germany possessing these great powers was more apparent than the menace of the Soviets possessing similar powers, although we all know how that would've skewed The Cold War. George Lucas must spend as much time watching Weird Travels on the Travel Channel as I do, because Roswell, the crystal skull legend, the Nazca lines in Peru, and Chariot of the Gods are all woven in one fabric.

The only thing I found annoying was the silly red scare business that got Indy the boot (temporarily) from Marshall College. Granted, it was believable there would be some suspicions because at the beginning of the film, Indy is forced by Soviet spies to break into a secret government warehouse. But it also makes him the only academic who has ever gotten in trouble for being too far to the left ;). His boss whines about "I don't understand this country anymore" as though everybody was getting dragged out in front of HUAC. During a chase scene, they run right through a crowd of anti-Communist protesters on the college campus. Come ON! It's almost as though Spielberg wanted to placate those 93-year-old screenwriters still upset over the blacklist in case he bumps into them at a cocktail party and they're unhappy with the Kartoon Komrades or that Indy is actually an anti-Commie himself.

I noticed that the movie is probably the most bloodless of the series. Oh sure, there's a nasty end by killer ants and another character spontaneously combusts, but no decapitations, spikes through the head, or literal meltdowns either. I also noticed there's more swearing this time around than before. They're not criticisms, just observations.

Overall, KOTCS put a big smile on my face. Is it improbable? Sure. Is it self-referential? Yes. Is it fanservice out the wazoo? You betcha! But so what? It's all in good fun. Like the SW movies, Indiana Jones movies get even better the more you watch them and while opinions will differ on how it holds up with Raiders, it's at the very least as good as any of the sequels. As I posted in response to a comment a few days ago, these movies are like a really good ride at Disneyland, the product of great imagineering. The ending could serve as finale to the series but aside from hints at further adventures with Shia LeBeouf's character, Ford indicates that perhaps the man in the hat is too legit to quit.